Mild Economical Horror

They will laugh,
as we knock on their door.
They will laugh,
as we do all the dying at war.

They will laugh,
like there’s nothing to care about,
They will laugh,
because those with cash have clout.

Their grin will turn into a smile,
when the wins become less.
Their laugh with turn to snicker,
with the first sign of distress.

Their wonder will turn to a mild horror,
as their empire evaporates like a tree.
Their pockets will eventually empty themselves,
by the rest of us giving and doing most everything for free.

 

What would you be willing to do for money ?

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About Death with David J.

October 17, 2011 12:00pm
Join Aslan and Jennifer Monday’s @ Noon in conversation about how art, science and philosophy interrelate with each other to form our collective and individual consciousness. We’re examining Death in society this month so put on your blackest clothes, dark eyeliner and tune in or download while sharing with others.

Our special guest will be the legendary ** David J. of Bauhaus/Love & Rockets ** in a live telephone interview from Los Angeles.  We will be discussing his new album ‘Not Long for this World’, and listening to the songs ‘Title Wave of Blood” and “Bloodsucker Blues”.


Today’s Topics

Picasso’s Dead Friend

The Avant-garde is Not Dead

The Death of Money and Banks

Is Bela Lugosi Really Dead ?

** David J **

Live DJ Set
Thursday, October 20
San Francisco’s Cat Club

Event Details

READIES ‘NOT LONG FOR THIS WORLD’ FOR HALLOWEEN RELEASE

SIGNED SONG-INSPIRED ARTWORK AVAILABLE WITH DOUBLE VINYL PRESSING

There’s really no better time for former Bauhaus and Love & Rockets bassist/vocalist DAVID J to release his latest album NOT LONG FOR THIS WORLD (Starry Records) for Halloween. It’s the season where darkness becomes beautiful, and beautiful darkness is just one of this legend’s many trademarks.

DAVID has set November 1 as the release date for his eighth offering as a solo artist, and it’s perfectly apropos.

NOT LONG FOR THIS WORLD is a collection of 12 hypnotic hymns, touting gorgeously elegiac lyrics, smoky jazz piano, shades of gothic ambience, dark theatricality, and dramatic rock energy in the tradition of DAVID‘s most revered output. It’s otherworldly, elegant, and infectiously powerful.

In addition, DAVID has prepared a one-of-a-kind piece of artwork representing each song on the record. He’s signing each piece, and listeners can purchase them as part of a special, limited edition vinyl package of the album. This vinyl is a double LP with an ornate gatefold, and it also boasts one extra song, “Lorca’s Death,” only available on vinyl. For collectors, this is a must-have.

NOT LONG FOR THIS WORLD will be released via Starry Records as part of a partnership with Smashing Pumpkins mastermind William Patrick Corgan and Kerry Brown alongside St. Rose Records. His impact has been felt intensely by both Billy and Kerry, and his influence remains prevalent in their work.

In other David J news, he will perform his show Silver for Gold (The Odyssey of Edie Sedgwick) Wednesday, November 30 to Sunday, December 4, in downtown Los Angeles at Redcat, CalArts’ Downtown Center for Innovative Visual, Performing, and Media Arts. Part delirious one-woman show, part avant-garde rock concert replete with eerie video imagery, this production written and directed by David J finds new mythic dimensions in the rise and eventual drugs and alcohol-fueled crash of Andy Warholmuse Edie Sedgwick. 

DAVID’s multi-dimensional career began with seminal goth legends Bauhaus. DAVID has since released seven albums with Love & Rockets, seven solo albums, and several solo EPs, as well as collaborations and session appearances with the likes of Jane’s Addiction, Genesis P. Orridge, Jarboe, author Alan Moore, and actress Fairuza Balk. NOT LONG FOR THIS WORLD–a rich gothic cabaret- inspired album–is evidence of a deep maturation, sure to attract old fans and new.

Because You’re Gone

Gloomy Sunday

Dead and Lovely

St. James Infirmary

Hank Williams to the Angel of Death

Spalding Gray Can’t Swim

Eulogy for Jeff Buckley

Dagger in the Well

The Last Cigarette

Dress Sexy at my Funeral

Farewell My Friend

Not Long For This World *

Lorca’s Death (bonus track)

Bad Friend Experience

You boo when there is a supoprtive cheer
you smile and nod nicely to my face
you pleasantly disagree with things dear
you bet against me and then rig the race
you grin but when i’m not looking it’s a sneer.

You laugh when i stumble with persistance
you frown when i am happy and succeed
you clap for long uncomfortable silence
you give bad advise when there is no need
I can’t stand the ‘Your Friend’ experience.

Modulated Endless Loops

Of course that’s the way it’s supposed to be

that’s the way it’s always been on t.v

the vortex of misunderstanding you

turns into something that just doesn’t do

new ideas are easy to disreject

there’s something else convenient to respect

excusesful reasons are always in que

anyone will work if you want it too

they unmodulate symbiotic groups

communication is an endless loop.

 

Military Fashion Show

Listen Now

August 30, 2011

Today’s Topics

Military Fashion Show
Dynamic Archetypical Duos
Tip Culture in the 22nd Century
‘B’-Corporations and Social Change

 Listen Live @ Noon on Tuesday  Or Podcast 

Governing Operational Dynamics

Observer and observed are connected

synchonystically complementary

time, light and gravity are what we are

begin with Euclidian postulates

dualistic perception of small scales

infinite causation is in effect

chiaroscuroistic interrelates

perceive mathematical reflections

ten multi-dimential perspectives

five higher senses are activated.

Mirror Self Convection

Mirroring all people is what we do

you are what you do see and want to be

smile begets smile frown begets frown

people become what they see on t.v.

pervasive paradigm paralysis

there is only reflection of your self

the deck is stacked against your consciousness

your free will is only partially real

we are attracted to what we want now

aetherspheric cerebral convection.

Strange Deep Blind

A strange kind of love and feeling swims through your eyes
like the doors of perception to a wide vast dominion
they open to your prize beyond the terror ground
a place for the rage where there are no broken hearts
white wash lies with just a taste for the truth
perfect taste of choice and meaningful looks in your eyes
blind to the gemstone alone we smile from a frown
should we stay or should we go while they circle round
we shout a rage so strong that knows no right or wrong
take a little piece of us into the dark middle ground.

That’s how it sometimes seems to to walk or to take
instead we stumble down to either side left or right
to love or to hate is to see the light while thrown in disgust
They speak of heroic feats that housed the fear forever
a howling wind changed the course and blew out of bounds
so sore are all the walls that bound us descending bleak and put upon
chew through your cheeks to wake up from you cerebral slumber
vases grow bigger to the eyes that snigger and despise
the wall grows taller up to doom thrown in disgust like shoes in a room
how we all fall to the worst and of course you say you don’t understand.

Your words write your fiction and your crooked hands scribe the lies
clearly now we tell your soul that all we say is all we can
we are nothing but hedonistic sin that learns to caste them in
while young girls with pretty fangs and slit crystal wrists
wait patiently for us to twist then look away like distant rains
water falls and honey dew days with us in black and blue rinsed eyes
gaze whistly at their slender thighs with a twist of shade to the right
spit at beelzebub on sight and go on loving for all to see living patiently
I find you in the morning after our dreams with cerbral signs
pour yourself into me like the sun is to the recently blind.

Lift me up high now and then get me out of your sphere within
keep me walking on air but never shout out with caution
hold your secret close because I hear everyone knows
the way it throws while it takes you in and spits you out
it spits you out with your desire to conquer and feel higher
follow and become ultra clean with mistakes that you mean
move the heart over and switch up the pace of your desire
look for what seems to be out of place and doesn’t quite seem
on and on it goes yeah like calling like a cold distant wind
as we walk through the zero hour we cut the thick and break the thin.

no sound to break and no moments clear when the doubts are crystal clear
crashing hard into the secret wind that knows the way it twists and turns
changing colour and spinning yarns the way it leaves you dry
it cuts you up and takes you high by the way it’s painted bright gold
is it honey or is it gold by the way it throws about and spits you out
that special kind of you would like the sun to shine through the blinds
lift me up and get us out and keep us walking but never shout
it’s okay because it goes this way while the line is thin and twists away
the Ocean is deep and the sea is vast alway asking how and why that’s me
your ocean heart is clothed in respect and sweet caresses unfurl my uneasy mind.

Imagine a set of steps easily climbed with the power of pride and plasticity of mind
where there lies a round table and the table stands for the power of our success
respect the sign with intelligence so cold your glass heart is surface deep
dip and swell in my sphere and you’ll find that deep caress open my uneasy mind
wave then dive in like the damp heart and the sun holds me so very cold
beyond the power fists the Ocean hearts are healing all of the uneasy minds
dive in with us and cling to the rock and always know that I’m quickly waiting
your heart is hard and you think your legs hurt because you smell of aching sweet success
a cerebral supernova would like anything to stop the pain from your fingers screaming
standing naked in the sun without a leather whose pain needs to wash, and let go the fear.

Take the steps to the other side with up-turned razors as the air is thick with karma
the sutra of a long way down listens to a boy that’s a long way down from heaven’s gate
heaven’s gate has no steps and the steps before you are to the tower of misplaced pride
the devil lied with drive up to the highest point where our lives and souls are saved
when the lives on the table stand for power, success and respect will dissolve steps
mothers love it so they say through sad eyed pearls and dropped lips
their old eyes skim with increasing lids and a tear falls as she describes
glances pierce through writer men as they spoke hushed and frailing hips
approaching death with a yearning heart with pride and no despise
hot tears flow as she recounts her favorite worded token about the Dharma.

Forgive me please for hurting you so and don’t again go away heartbroken no
wise owl tones with velvet lies crush her velvet lining and calls the fools
they write on your wall with a forked tongue about you and your secret life
dead hands will change the plot and will make your loving sound like snakes
you were never really that hot and hot tears flow as she revises and recounts
wondering aimlessly while walking down a long and winding grey paved street
breaths from your only friend warm the chattering others surrounding you
going out again and again just to be seen and laugh with a gas new crowd
tell yourself lies while buttoning up a new red shirt meant to allure
twenty years of doing this ritual just the same into the dark night glow.

Day after day with your preset mind you wake up with a preset find
with no self control you decide to wake and call the empty Roll Call
the socialites who are mortified yet see fear as their next surprise
you’re happy with nothing but the bitter sweet F.A. of the night
believing that they’re alive and real but if asked you’re not sure
they have nothing to yell except the words of a clashing rhyme
calmed down and out of sync so even real sounds like zero time
to a brain stuck in the lip sync Roll’ there is no wrong or right
forget your preset mind and Roll with us to a very welcomed fall
the night is endless with you in it with or without your mind.

As the day grows older the moon appears as if in a two way mirror
in a fire side mirror a distant walker hears the call to do good deeds
the moon and the sun feel okay like partners in a dualistic light
separating his reflecting with one beam of light and one dark
hearing this confusion wanes with no need to ask for more wealth
one thing more is all we need and now we go into the night
he feels the same as a cool hot summers climb through the weeds
the voice comes with no shame and bad deeds for which he must pay
walking the line as the day grows older, heavy-weighed and pierced
the moon reflects his heart and another image hits seven veils of the mind

The walker looks at his days and knows not how they came to pass
one day you will be the one to say I’m sick of all of this empty fun
if your faith is strong it means you are no longer being led astray
you can see that all the light comes straight from our shimmering sun
soon we will be with the one that will show when the lights turn green
I want to get near so I can be clear that soon I will merge with the one
there is no time for this requited love in which I thirst and yearn for
don’t be shy and don’t get caught with the world and its thoughts
I’m not asking for obtuse idol worship or lazy sleazy thoughts
walk with me now into the dark light and there we will repast.

The Sister of Sleep thought of him as a strange and good looking man
darkened eyes are hidden from view in empty puddles of shallow hue
views on death spread like two anecdotal tales reclining and declining
death is the surname of sleep but the surname is unknown to us
disclose in public these opinions of the tales that hold the key
sleep is end of daily life and a small practice exercise in death
not every brother and sister are equally close while holding onto nothing
giving into the enemy within with a small exercise in submission
a wide and vast dominion will open your eyes to your awaiting prize
this is a known terror ground and place for the misplaced rage.

Searching through the wasteland we see a blazing white light
soaring birds now hunt with hunger and gripped the thirsty brow
win the battle with me that is clearly and painfully wafer thin
between the devil’s teeth is a line which can never repeat
push me in and take me toward the signified as the subject is taught
a war within a war within a head and heart for us to newly begin
bemused we flinch with no easy work for the invited we loath and shirk
how will you feel when all you have and all that you own are gone
your only true friend dances above you in the mindful firmament
the blood of the prophets flow out of reach from their aching speech.

Transmogrification of ‘Deep’ by Peter Murphy

http://www.petermurphy.info/

http://www.lyricsdepot.com/album/peter-murphy/deep.html

Floating Time Vortex


Imagine you were born and raised on a big fancy floating dome
destined to live a long happy life and never yearn to see the shore
the Pacific ocean vortex is where you have always called home
your dome-ship is drifting with everything you could want or adore
born with a time-age-dilation and everyone wants to have your clone.

When alone you don’t age one little bit and in essence time does stop like Zen
when in the visual company of others you age slowly but very exponentially
the more people you can see the faster you age and that can see you is x 10
going to a ball game with a few friends would age you a week for being sociably
catching a home-run or for some other reason being on national t.v. would do you in.

Whenever you wish for something new or exotic to taste – smell – feel – hear and see
all of your desires are provided for as long as it doesn’t include drifting near sand
a ship arrives silently the very next day with everything including your favorite party
your guests are dazzled by your worldly brilliance and envy your luxurious life span
they are baffled that you’re content aging alone and get by by having fun and being arty.

You give the tour and explain every inch of the dome-home that was built to perpetually sift
there is only one part of the boat you don’t understand and gave up trying along time ago
the emergency navigation system is there in case for some reason you drift to close to the rift
it can weather any storm but usually avoids them with the precognitive advance slip stream
it will propel you back to where you began to once again begin a long trip with the vortex drift.

For as long as you can remember the emergency navigation system has been activated twice
once when you were too young to understand what was going on but remember it well anyway
the other not long ago and the feelings still linger of calling the big bluff and roll the shore dice
you’ve been preparing for this your whole life but wasn’t quite sure the direction to swim away
you often feel the shoreline is just out of sight and took the risk to swim to the horizon thrice.

When the party’s over everyone leaves with the supply ship and they never return again
a new group of people will arrive the next time to provide your material necessities
there’s always a person you wish could stay longer just to share in one little sin
when that happens the dome begins to drift towards the time vortex with ease
there is no purpose when you are always alone and perpetually at begin.

Your one true wish is to be able to swim beyond the distant horizon
you exchanged it for a cerebral transubstantiation aging dilation
in your world you need not and are the ruler of an entire ocean.

i Now Know No

i don’t know who you really are
i don’t know why you’re really here
i understand the near and far
i understand the confusion and fear.

Now is the moment to be in power
now is the way to rightfully be
now is the key to the knowledge tower
now is the power to finally see.

Know is what i very want to sing
know is what i’ve always swerved
no is the answer to everything
no is the answer that’s deserved.

Which Way Out

Which of you are real
which of you are fake
which of you feed and heal
which of you snake and take?

Way to go again and again
way to find another way out
way to walk into the wrong sin
way to hide away and pout.

Out is out there somewhere
out is the best way to see
out of everything except gravity
out of your mind is where i’d rather be.

Blinded Wow Love

bluelip

A blind woman with a blinded love
in a blind land wishing for a real man
one who will give her a life from above
the one who will hold her light and stand.

This secret wish is another secret worth telling
unhappiness is lost where hearts have to search
a hidden place from a sad heart that’s high flying
to the place where you can even follow and perch.

In what place will I not become a predator of my self
long-time since never checking in n’ write this once forgot
was surprised and amazed that someone reads from a shelf
join in the jumping because the happy joy mode is on the slot.

More amazed to read invitations that follow when we sneak on in
WWWWWWWOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW what a wonder to behold
four thumbs up 4 an average OOOPS then fall down and hahaha again
there is someone missing me or recently using my media to write and old.

She wants to be fair to both of them by meaning what she says with her ad
here she is ready to write and share her feelings with everyone once again
get set peeps and tighten yo seat belt coz Ninoy’s gonna make u mad
bunches of loves she has to offer us with lotsa fun and pretend sin.

She knows her real problems and she knows her unreal fears
it’s true but hold on tight and don’t you ever want to quit
she knows that her sorrows are lost in her wet tears
it’s true that she doesn’t know how to hard hit.

To tell you the simple truth without the loss
the Universe knows more than anybody
she comes to wipe it away like floss
doing it right and having it ready.

It’s done as soon as it can be
which no end to tomorrows
mourn the comfort too see
burdens and our sorrows.

Pucker Power

Yellow drops of pucker power
to quench a writers long lost thirst
glands swell from nature’s sour
auto-writing in red here is a first.

Bite in now and let the drops drip
strands of thick pulp flossing teeth
rejoice in the juice and take a sip

taste-buds tingle from underneath.

Stimulate and reverberate your mind
in a room full of aetherspheric looks
reading poems around your own kind
embrace the pucker then write your books.

Ultra Vivid You

Ultra is how I think of you

ultra is how you feel when I do

ultra is how you take me over

ultra is how we aetherially dew.

Vivid is your electrochem charge

vivid is your outer flow glow

vivid is your shimmering self

vivid is your feelings we know.

You always move in sync with me

you always wish to spend the day

you always sense my presence

you always want to make me stay.

Essensial Musical Breathe

Dedicated to making things with objects of statement
invoking fear instantly and nicer than expected
tall and soft dark bites makes things very blatant
wildly creative and a feisty crackpot unperfected.

Stay drama free and free from those who are fleeting
no manicures needed for breaking and diving
not treasure seeking or upwards eye gleeming
slowly starving on the brink of ultra-funning.

Music is the essential me as the air the we breathe
play from wake time till it’s time to fade to sleepy
stereos in the studios as the speakers sound weave
headphones everywhere in between all things pretty.

The necessary evil of a planned obsolescence
skinny art boys and poets hate sports too
suits optional when you’re full of reluctance
owning more of nothing appeals to not only you.

Forgotten Lost Girlfriend

Being with you was like being alone except alone was the fun way

love is the game you play and when i say I love you it’s like passing go

you were always happy each and every time there was a big pay-day

spending greenbacks unearned was your chosen path to go with the flow.

You always wore your best white dress when there was cash on the table

isolation of the sour soul and degradation as part of your entry-exit hole

figuring everything out all alone and what to do next alone as well

not being there when it counts but always feigning becoming whole.

Your style of the silent treatment could be considered a dark art

demanding the impossible and distraught at the well lighted end

blissful at the failures of others and cry real tears for a happy heart

trinkets instead of genuine affection about the forgotten girlfriend.

Cerebral Shimmering Platonia

Trapped inside a world of shadows your reality is hidden in plain sight
all that you see isn’t all that has to do with what you believe is your reality
enlightened shackles vanish but familiar forms think you’ve lost your cache’
the pathway between your destiny and the sun is sometimes dark shimmering
can you claim to really know reality if everything you believe is based on lies
you can’t be deceived if the truths you’ve been told all sound so deceptively wise
prisoners of the popaganda phase of an Earthly human consciousness evolving
all things begin in the Form of the good Sun and when they go bad they decay
imagine you are moving big piles of rocks in a circle with lots of others to see
shadowlands of your four-dimensional mind-self is where consciousness fight.

Eternal archetypal Forms are more than theory and can be proven mathematically
critical questioning and analysing concepts with priori reasoning that comes before
becoming organic and being elemental with no changes or decay in consciousness
if we grasp the ideal our consciousnesses will collaborate in an effective manner
our utopic republic is more than imaginary and an ideal society is being fabricated
that ultra-reality is that some good will prevail and that you and we are assimilated
resolving from a dialectic in a cooperative of similar-minds like a cerebral scanner
knowledge is latent within an ultra-consciousness that is unable or wants to digress
the immortality of your soul depends solely upon the energy behind your black door
the thoughts of others give an energy unattainable by thinking by yourself Socratically.

Plato abandon his home at the execution suicide of his friend and mentor Socrates
influenced by Pythagorean philosophy and upon returning home founded an academy
this first university is where Aristotle turned for his formative cerebral conditioning
apply critical thinking and questioning to your own self-decisions first and foremost
clearly define ethical quality and out the true nature of ignorance of the multitudes
claims of reality must be properly qualified and not matters of opinionated amplitudes
those with wisdom have authority and those with authority often betray their post
coming closer to the truth requires questions that reveal implicit ideals maximising
the ideal can be attained in the eyes of others with a neo-positive doctrine of destiny
the views of authority are usually the same as those who feed and pay them to appease.

Flash Mobs for Peace

This is the real thing
this is not a drill
this is the beginning
of the end of the kill.

You are my accomplice
you have been all along
i didn’t know it aether
i was just singing my song.

Here is your chance to brandish your bold
with a secret flash mob schreeking mission
the story will be in the aethersphere and re-told
from the Peace capital of Earth Day here is a Vision.

You’ll be helping to let revolutionary history begin,
with the internet + poetry you =ly contribute your voice
poems of positive protest will be read very loud again
scheek at the public transit station in the city of your choice.

With packs of poets and impassioned true-blood friends
your objective is a display of creative peace activism
you will be transmogrifying what has already begun
words of positive peace and responsible hedonism.

Transubstansiatiate at transit stations with each other
observe silence with wheels approaching and leaving
take this sacred relative time to sense your sister and brother
then there is no train or bus your voice should be schreeking.

Why should you do this ?
why should you care ?
What if i’m usually right ?
and you didn’t take the dare ?

Upon us is the curation of our aetherspheric generation
leading creative activism at the hidden Peace Museum in San Francisco
the door has been wide opened with your voice as my final application
if you schreek loud enough, one day soon we’ll meet at an underground disco.

How is something like reality suspend when most people never knew it existed
this is the place to see the future in action and when you do, you can’t get arrested
It’s the only place on earth you can buy a $ 1,000,000 Latte and get a free lunch too
of your voices will reverberate and transmogrify your own personal aethersphere.

The echo of your howling will lead to a posting with the hidden location
this will be like no place on Earth because reality is suspended upon entering
your ‘likes’ will be forever recorded to say that you helped me name the museum
at the end of each poem schreek as loud as you can “Give us Sunchild and Moonbeam.”

Please choose your most inspirational and revolutionary poet and the honour will be mine if you choose me:

https://agentaslan.wordpress.com/category/social-commentary

please share veraciously

Sassy Shackled Ankels

This world of social engineering is painfully engaging
the cup seems dried with dregs of vacant bitterness
voices sewn shut and stained cheeks with tearing
let the crowd stick to oval holes of emptiness
a blind mole-like mentality blindly hurting.

Sweeter than you think of a unique visionary
blazing forests don’t follow the damp leader
cane flailings dance with a lacklustre morality
feelings come deeper and swim with a sinker
embrace the differently downtrodden eternally.

The moments you touch with reaching velvet silken hands
hidden places aching that only you can make ache that way
the omega love/lust connection is fraught with hour sands
bruising kisses of the evening hardness then soft by day
feeding addictions of desire with mutually planned plans.

Meeting the needs in between that of want and strife
there’s a razor thin line between sweetened and sweet
hair pulling passion with a lie we both share in rife
committed and adulterous while still in mourning to meet
being entwined in a perfect union with a lover of life.

Shackled ankles are always ready to be slightly unbound
baking cookies in negligee and silk scarves flowing
be sweet and rough and change my face to being unfrowned
transparency in a flawed interlude of internal glowing
tongue twisted lips tied to your singing sultry sound.

A modicum of “difference” makes you more understanding
a prescience believed singing and shouting it out loud
a really lived beatitude life of raw nude existing
a cloud of your conscience seeing the facebook crowd
a quirky chaser brazenly defiant in the act of living.

The broken and battered are a kindred disjointed folk
just like being there the yokes of a never-ending pain
years of tears peppered with split seconds of pseudo hope
flowing syllabic evolutions are going to once again regain
who knows but for now just write while you continue to choke.

Knowing that perhaps the best work is laying latent
kicking rocks is gone forever replaced with shallow breath
take a sick pleasure in knowing that few get my intent
see me like they used to before my poetic birth and death
lurking in the locked box with stripped poems of discontent.

Square pegs shining in a semi-final round of proclivity
prelude to alliterative experience of intimate assonance
dancing with words one at a time or maybe up to twenty
plenty of rhetoric spewed with silent cognitive dissonance
words take on a life of their own with each one worth a penny.

A visage is smeared in the angst of tumultuous torrent
heckled profusely for being hated and once again shamed
no one cares and they can’t see the trees or the forest
adoration of writing their way out of ever being gamed
the things you’re beaten for are usually your favourite.

Transmogrification of three poems by Amy Gabrial
http://sassifiable.com/

Pharmacide; Philosophy : Art : Physics
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/43344

i Never Wish

i wish that i had cheated,
i wish that i had often lied,
i wish i had the realisation,
your soul had long ago died.

i wish that i had left sooner,
i wish that i had quickly run,
i wish i had the realisation,
being with you was no fun.

i wish i could forget your face,
i wish i could forget your voice,
i wish i had the ability,
to turn back time and make another choice.

i wish i wasn’t shattered
i wish i wasn’t broken
i wish that when my parents met,
never a word was spoken.

i wish there was faith,
i wish there was belief,
i wish i could remember,
the feeling of pleasant relief.

i wish sometimes it all would end,
i wish sometimes i couldn’t stop
i wish sometimes to take my eyes,
off of the distant mountain top.

i wish i couldn’t understand,
i wish i could just give up,
i wish someone would hold my hand,
who wasn’t pushing me down.

Pharmacide: free download available
http://www.smashwords.com/booksview/43344